Self Awareness through Body Behaviour Workshop

Self Awareness through Body Behaviour Workshop
Body Behaviour Workshop in Tiruvannamalai

How often are we aware of our inner state of being?

Can we become aware of our emotions as they begin to arise, before they become a flood?

How do we monitor our daily thoughts and emotions?

How stressed and anxious are we in our daily routine?

Self awareness is a way of progress – both spiritual as well as material. Awareness of our inner state of being helps us identify and work through various phases in our lives. It helps us with keeping healthy relationships both with ourselves as well as with our loved ones.

Watching our thoughts can be a difficult and, at times, a most frustrating of endeavors. Luckily each of us have an anchor – the physical body. Our bodies not only help keep us grounded in the present moment but they are also perfect mirrors for all our thoughts – both conscious and subconscious.

Almost all of our body behaviour, be it a gesture, a movement, a posture, or an expression, is a reflection of our inner state of being. By learning to watch our body behaviour everyday, we gain access into the inner recesses of our emotional and mental states. We can become aware of our anxieties, our stress-related thoughts, our emotional tipping points, our inner fears and motivations. Over time, the practice can help us identify self-destructive and repeating patterns in which our lives sometimes seem to get caught in.

It also helps us have better interpersonal relationships as we learn to be more empathetic towards others around us because we can understand them beyond their spoken words and defensive behaviours.

IN THE WORKSHOP:

We will learn to observe ourselves and understand our gestures, postures, expressions, micro-expressions, and micro-gestures that we commonly exhibit in our daily routines.

We will examine various real life video footages of people to practically understand the body behaviour in various circumstances.

We will participate in discussions on moral/social/religious issues that can bring up various defensive and offensive gestures and behaviour in us. This will help us in watching our body behaviour as emotions and thoughts arise, flow and subside.

We will record and interpret videos of our introductions, discussions, and other physical activity we may participate in. In short, we deepen our awareness of ourselves.

WORKSHOP DATES:

25th March (Saturday) – 10 am till 6pm
26th March (Sunday) – 9am till 5pm
Participants will have to bring their own notebooks and stationary. If they want a copy of their recordings, then they are requested to bring their own usb drives on the second day.

*The workshop is limited to 8-10 participants only.

WORKSHOP FEE:

Gift Economy (you may pay from your heart whatever you are willing and able to)

Click the link for Registration: https://goo.gl/forms/R0L85AojTt0LMvVg1

About the facilitator – Kiran:

Kiran comes from a background of therapy and healing. He is a Hypnotherapist and a Reiki Healer with an experience of about 5 years. He has been conducting workshops on Non-verbal Behaviour for about eight years now.

FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS:

Is this workshop same as a workshop on Body Language?

Body Language, of late, has come to mean manipulation of our body behaviour and appearance in order to project a false image of ourselves to gain advantage of a social or a professional situation. In such workshops we are encouraged to control and hide our original emotions and thoughts, and also to assume non-existent rapport with other persons for our own gain. Our workshop is different from it.

In fact, the opposite is encouraged here. An honest exploration of our body behaviour in order to unearth underlying emotions and thoughts is the focus of this workshop with a goal of eventual release of our self-limiting beliefs, fears, and blocked emotions.

Will I be taught how to better present myself in professional situations and impress others?

No. This workshop focuses on exploring our authentic selves beneath and beyond our social masks and images.

Who is eligible to participate?

Anyone with an interest in self-exploration and self-healing is welcome to join us. Age is no bar.

Can I control my emotions like anger and sorrow after this workshop?

When you say control, I am assuming you mean resolution. That is being able to resolve emotional issues. In that case, this workshop would be a good start, yes.

Here we learn to identify and become aware of our internal resistances and reactions. All ‘dark’ emotions start off as a resistance to an external situation and with body awareness we can identify them and examine the root causes of these emotions.

Awareness would be the emphasis of this workshop, since awareness is needed for any release/resolution. Do understand that in case of certain long-standing traumas and deeply blocked emotions you do need acceptance and surrender to your emotional state especially when the resolution/release begins.

Reiki Workshop on Jan 7 & 8, 2017 in Hyderabad

meditation-1384758Begin the New Year by taking your health into your hands. Learn a healing system that will help you heal and manage your issues in life. Start 2017 by becoming a Reiki Healer! We are conducting a Reiki Healing Workshop Levels 1 & 2 coming January 7 & 8 (Sat, Sun), 2017.

Reiki is a Japanese form of Holistic Healing System where the Reiki Healer channelizes healing energies into the client to heal our energetic bodies and, via it, heal our issues in life. Reiki also promotes general and spiritual well-being of a person, improves health, relieves stress and anxiety. Stress and anxiety are the root causes for many ailments physical, mental as well as emotional.

The number of participants is limited between 6 & 8 only. Please register now to book your seat in this workshop! Please read our FAQs to learn more Reiki. For Registrations call Geetha @ 9394301400.

5 Greatest Misconceptions about Meditation

We make meditation difficult by turning it an impossible feat and a near-superhuman ability. But in truth meditation can be so easy. Read on to find out about the five greatest misconceptions about meditation that prevent us from benefiting from this greatest method of self-healing!

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Meditation is easy.

We make meditation difficult by turning it an impossible feat and a near-superhuman ability. But in truth meditation can be so easy. Here are the five greatest misconceptions about meditation that prevent us from benefiting from this greatest way of self-healing!

Meditation is Intense Concentration – Meditation is the relaxation of the mind, not the exercise of it. Trying to concentrate consciously is like stiffening your muscles for a body massage. It is counterproductive to meditation.

Concentration is actually a side-effect or benefit of good meditation. Most people, even many meditation teachers mistake it for meditation. It is not. Meditation is easy focus; like the way you would spend an evening at the beach with a book. You really don’t concentrate on anything. You just let your mind relax.

Meditation is Total Absence of Thoughts – It is not. Once again this is a by-product of meditation sometimes and it is mistaken to be meditation. Meditation is simple awareness of your thoughts. You know that if you try to stop your mind from thinking about something all the mind can then think of is that which you don’t want to think about. And a lot of beginners give up meditation because of this. They think they are simply unfit for meditation. As if someone can be unfit to relax!

In meditation you are training your mind to take your thoughts less seriously. This is done simply by letting your mind think and at the same time watching those thoughts with an attitude of a dispassionate bystander. As if your thoughts are some vehicles passing on the street below as you watch them from your balcony. Yes in the beginning you tend to get lost with the thinking easily. That is the bystander becomes the driver of the car. And all you do, as soon as you realize this, is to go back to watching your thoughts idly.

Meditation must be done only at a certain Place And Time – It is not a must, it just an option. In fact, as a beginner you are most likely setting up yourself for failure if think you must do it at a certain place and only at an appointed hour. Because, then, even if you miss it once you are likely to get frustrated and give your mind an opportunity to quit it altogether. Sure meditating at a certain place and at a regular hour will help with your practice. But there is another benefit to meditating at various hours and at various places every day.

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Even simple sounds such as the patter of water can help you relax your mind and meditate.

That is gaining the ability to relax your mind anyplace and at anytime. Anything can help you do that. The sounds and sights around you, watching your thoughts, being aware of sensations on the body, literally anything! One of the best methods is to combine both techniques of meditation. Meditate at a regular spot and time for a slightly longer time like, say between 10 and 30 minutes, and then meditate just for a minute or two at various times of the day wherever you are. This is one of the best combinations that works for me always! Then even if I skip the longer meditation I am not so disappointed, and I also gain the capacity to relax and heal in midst of work and noise! Try it and see!

Meditation takes a long time to master – What do you want – mastery or benefits of mediation like peace of mind, and mental clarity? Of course, by ‘mastery’ most people assume staying in a particular posture for long hours with intense concentration and without any thoughts whatsoever! Even the most practiced of all meditators cannot claim such an achievement! In a yogic practice such a  state is called Samadhi, whereas meditation is called Dhyana – a state of continued awareness that can lead to Samadhi if the aspirant wishes it. So meditation is different from Samadhi.

The long-term benefits of meditation require sometime to pop up in your life. The immediate benefits of mediation are, however, quite readily apparent. And meditation by itself does not take months or years to master. How many seconds do you need to relax? Relaxing the mind is successful mediation! To be able to relax with such consistency takes regular practice but by no means more than a couple of months if you really go at it.

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Meditation is simple awareness of thoughts!

Meditation is Difficult – Do you really think it is that difficult even after reading all of the points above? Meditation is easy! We are all programmed to believe that we cannot gain anything unless we work hard towards it. And then we translate that belief into mental work too. Mind works the opposite. The harder we try to control the mind, the more violent and chaotic it becomes. In fact, our efforts to control it are adding to the mental noise not easing it.

The trick with the mind is to relax it by letting it wander. And then simply watching it without much reaction. It is easy to do. With enough practice you learn to do it even when you are disturbed. What you need here is not hard work, but short and easy repetitions. Remember, meditation is easy!

 

Find out what you think about yourself!

We always carry a self-image or a definition of self in not just our heads but in our actions, postures, and critical decisions we make in our lives. In fact, if we look at ourselves closely, the ‘I’ that exists is that self-image. We’d also like to think that we know ourselves better than others do about us and we are very clear about the self-image we hold within. But the truth is almost always far from it. Self awareness is as scarce as common sense. What we believe consciously to be our self-image is, in fact, the defensive-self or the mask we’ve created to face the world. A mask that we’ve built very early in life and have been developing and polishing ever since.

But the true image we hold of ourselves is very deep in our subconscious minds that it takes some practice of awareness to come in contact with it. We get brief glimpse of it when we are provoked into emotion unexpectedly and in our dreams. There are very simple exercises to find out what is truly our opinion about ourselves.

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Voices in your head are subconscious projections of your self-image

If you’d read one of my previous posts about Voices we carry in our heads (opens in new tab/window), you’ll know that most of the time the arguments we have with other people in our heads are not really arguments with others, but actually an inner conflict. I’ve categorized in that post, the various kinds of voices we carry and it is those voices that provide us with real clues and thoughts about self-image.

These ‘voices’ in our heads are extensions of conflicts we’ve had with others in our lives. For instance, say your spouse said something about you and you found it judgmental – say about your capacity to speak up against your boss, you may or may not argue with your spouse about it, but you then carry around a ‘voice’ of your spouse judging your similarly through your daily activities. And you start an internal argument with that voice and it gradually becomes a part of your daily mental noise.

Now coming back to finding out your self-image through the use of this inner voices we carry in our heads, every time an argument pops up in your head try to look at it dispassionately and without attachment as if you are listening to two strangers speaking to each other at a bus stop. By doing that the first thing you may notice about the voice is that it is not actually a real person speaking to you at that point of time but an imagination on your part. Any voice in your head is a part of your imagination and therefore an extension of your beliefs about yourself and not opinions of others. See what category the voice falls into (see Voices in our Heads for the categories).

Voices of guilt and shame point to a kind of self opinion, like say seeing ourselves as a ‘bad’ person or a ‘sinner’. They may even speak about how ‘deserving’ of something good we feel we are. ‘Put-me-downers’ speak about our opinions about our capabilities. They could also be speaking of the ‘loser’ in us. Morality checks also speak about our guilt – more likely our current actions and our own approval and disapproval of them. Voices usually fall into more than one category since at a deeper level all our problems are interconnected webs springing from our sense of insecurity, self-hatred, and fear.

Once you start trying to find your self-image through this exercise, you may encounter the difficulty of trying to watch your inner arguments being pulled into them. It is an expected difficulty. Just keep on with the practice. Every second of dispassionate observation adds to inner enlightenment. Some ‘voice’ may even start commenting on your inability to stay detached and try to use this activity to feed your mental noise. Just be aware of it, and you will be able to bypass it. Remember, awareness is the key.

Voices in Our Heads

How we imagine criticism from others and carry those voices in our heads to keep our sanity alive.

“Voices in Our Heads
Voices in Our Heads
We carry them to our grave”

Often people judge us. They are ever willing to comment upon our appearance, performance, occupation, status, behavior, our decisions and some intrepid commentators even enter our minds to dictate our thought flow.

Who are these people who judge us? If we care to spare a thought to it, we’d realize they are not faceless and nameless bunch of strangers we often call society, but they are the very near and dear. Beginning with our parents, they include our sibling, our friends, spouses, children, families next door, colleagues in office, mates in classrooms, and now our friends on Facebook, Twitter, and other social networks we frequent. In fact the closer a person is to us, more their opinion matters.

How often do we let our actions and decisions in our lives be influenced by how others perceive us? We like to think it isn’t as often as it actually is . Again, if we cared to notice we would be shocked to see how much we go out of our way to impress our judges and to conform to their standards. And boy do we hate ourselves for it! Some of us do the opposite and do everything possible to provoke and anger the judges of their world. And boy do they hate themselves for it!

But the greatest woe to us being social animals is how we carry the voices of these judges in our heads even in their physical absence and let those voices dictate our reactions and behavior. In fact, if we really observe, we are more influenced by the voices in our heads than actual situations of judgement and criticism from outside in our lives. We lose peace and joy with these voices running our lives from our heads. How are we to let go of these voices ? How can we shut those people from passing commentary and judgement on everything we do?

It begins with the stark realization that these people do not actually exist except when we are in direct contact with them! What it means is that their voices in our heads are not opinions of people but are distorted echoes of our own beliefs and programming. It is easier to understand this if we understand the kinds of voices we carry in our heads.

Voices of Guilt

Friend/Colleague: “Well, at least I take care of my parents! I didn’t abandon them in their old age!”

Parent or Spouse shaking their head in disapproval when we are tempted to drink more or spend money on shopping.

Guilt is a sticky residue that takes very long to wear off. In social structures, guilt and fear are greatest tools for control and they are used everywhere right from child rearing to politics in keeping vast populations in check. It is easy to find people who can be the judges of our guilt in our heads. In the beginning it is the parents, then we have friends, sibling, spouses, colleagues doing the jobs satisfactorily in our heads. Essentially they are our conscience.

Shame Reminders

Shame is a stronger counterpart of guilt. Religious and national shame and guilt are commonly programmed in early life. Shame about sexuality is a very strong programming that leads to suppression of physical joy and pleasure. Hence imaginary voices reminding us of our shame is one of the easiest to surface since suppressed emotions do not tend to stay suppressed for very long.

It is more common among those of us who have been rebellious against norms and morals in our early ages. It is also commonly prevalent among those who have been sexually abused/exploited.

Morality Checks

A studious brother/sister becomes a morality checker in the head of a cheating student.

A environment friendly colleague turns a morality checker for a luxury loving person.

Guilt in turn breeds severity. Eventually, guilt in our psyche turns us into moral policemen of sorts first with ourselves and then with our families and professional circles. We find convenient voices from our own family and circles to be moral reminders. These are played in our heads as imaginary situations where our moral laxity is being noticed by the more upright person. Sometimes we find also ourselves wondering how the other person would behave in a situation that we currently are in and that imaginary situation can influence our current decisions.

Put-Me-Downers

Parent/Teacher/Team Leader: “You could have done better!”

Neighbor/Old Classmate/Wealthy Uncle: “Do you know how much I earn in a year?”

How often we hear voices of our near and dear in our heads disparaging our accomplishments and efforts. Birthed by own low self-esteem and self worth, these voices seek to increase guilt and constantly make us feel worthless. No matter what our accomplishments or how proud we feel about them, these voices will quickly demolish the pride and the perspective.

Self Hatred Voices

Shame makes us hate ourselves. And since guilt and shame cannot be kept hidden for long, they gradually increase self-hatred, which in turn feeds the shame and guilt. A vicious cycle indeed! These voices are stronger and more malicious than Put-Me-Downer voices. They bring a barrage of shame, guilt, moral degradation, feelings of worthlessness all at once. It also breeds rage within.

The voices of people we employ in our heads to feed our feelings of self-hatred turn those people into real villains for us in our social lives. They become unforgivable and hateful for us. A real challenge to overcome!

Sometimes these voices are also faceless criticisms running in our heads. Eventually they wear the masks of someone we know. At times it is a random stranger we face in the streets. At times it is even a simple sound or smell. For instance the sound of running water is a guilt reminder for me. I cannot be peaceful until I find the source of the running water and turn it off.

By now its become clear that most of these voices stem from unresolved emotions and bad self-opinion we carry within. We simply put masks to those voices, blame people around us for the suffering we undergo and attempt to unsatisfactorily resolve the situation by reacting to or avoiding the people around us. In all honesty we know that isn’t the problem.

Another aspect that becomes clear to us is that we love the drama of arguing within our heads. Demonizing somebody other than us is the easiest way to keep the drama alive.

So how do we free ourselves from these debilitating self-criticisms?

Keeping our heads above the waters

Well the first step is to keep our heads above the waters. That is to be clear at all times that the voices we carry in our heads do not really belong to the persons we imagine them to be of but they are just projections of our own suppressed/undealt psyche. That way we do not drown in the drama of emotions.

The simplest way to deal with this is to look at the drama in our head when it is happening and asking ourselves if the voice that is running in the mind actually has a physical body then and there. Is the person actually present right now or am I simply arguing with her/him in my head? When the person is not present, it means that the criticism in the head is a mental project of my own thoughts no matter how true it seems to the character of the person I imagine the voice to be of. At times even such validation cannot keep us from the temptation to have drama in our heads. Especially when we are righteously angered which is most anger!

Facing our hidden selves

The second step is facing the hidden emotions and beliefs. We can never really be free of self-accusations until we learn to face the suppressed emotions and programs that are causing the accusations to fly in the first place.

Most of us are afraid of facing them. We assume that by bringing up the suppressed emotions we will bring back all the bad things that have happened to us in the past. Some of us even go to the extent of ‘rationalizing’ them away. That is one of the greatest sins of our times – using rationality to desensitize ourselves. Emotions cannot always be ‘rationalized away’, they just disappear into our subconscious to work within us below the radar of the conscious mind.

Facing the suppressed emotions does mean facing some of our greatest fears but also not at the same time. Just like we put masks and voices to our own unresolved emotions and conflicting beliefs, similarly we also have objectified our greatest fears. All fear is simply fear at the end. The object of fear is the mask we have created in order to keep our sanity alive. Facing our unresolved emotions does not mean we will be forced to face the objects of fear, but it means facing the fear itself.

And by facing, it simply means that – facing. Not trying to deal with it, not trying to work through it, not trying to be courageous. But simply sitting with it and watching it.

Letting our fears through

Unresolved emotions remain unresolved because we haven’t let them through. We haven’t let them go. Facing the emotions and fears means letting them go. How to do that? Ever heard a bell or a gong ring. It begins with a rising pitch, reaches a peak pitch, and begins to fade and finally it is gone. Letting emotions pass is very similar to listening to the ringing of a bell. We just have to watch them through. We do not have to do that all at once, we just have to begin. Can we not do that?

The greatest obstacle to watching our guilts, shame, and fears go is not the lack of ability to do so but our programmed beliefs and moral codes. Social, educational, economical, religious, political, spiritual and cultural morals, codes, beliefs, and systems that have been devised keep our humanity alive have today themselves have become roadblocks to their own goals. We are afraid that by letting our guilts and shame go, we would turn decadent and immoral. But it is, in truth, our repressed emotions that are leading us to violate our moral codes and beliefs. And letting go of guilt does not lead to lack of restraint. Hanging on to it does.

Similar false logic applies to our fears. If I let go of my greatest fear, then I will face my greatest fear. That is my fear of ghosts is what is keeping me from being tormented by ghosts. But the truth is if I let go of my greatest fear, then there is no greatest fear to face at all.

Can we keep away from such mind play? Can we really question our beliefs and codes? Not to break them or bypass them, but to let go of our prejudices against ourselves. We need a healthy relationship with ourselves over a healthy relationship with our beliefs and programs. Can we not do that?

Reiki Healing in Hyderabad

Purple Room Healing is now in Hyderabad with Reiki Healing and Reiki Workshops only. Currently our services include:

Reiki Healing for
Physical Diseases like Diabetes, Allergies, Blood Pressure, Joint or Body Pains, Migraine Headaches, Asthma, Arthritis, Spondylitis, Stress Relief, etc.
Emotional and Relationship Issues
Spirit/Energy Attachments

For Appointment and other queries contact:
Geetha Pallavi
Reiki Master – William Lee Rand
Mob: 9394301400

We Are Going On A Long Leave

Short GoodbyeThere come many opportunities in a person’s life when they can choose to follow their hearts or continue living in fears and insecurities of the mind. We (Geetha and I) have passed through quite a few and perhaps there lie a few more ahead of us. Most of the times, our choice was of the heart but once in a while we let our fears cloud us and keep us in the same of loop of suffering. We are once more at one such juncture in our lives.

This time the choice was unhesitating and simultaneous for both of us. Now, we’ve both come to a clear realization that further and truer healing cannot happen with conventional therapy but rather through a deeper introspection and awareness. And stepping into pure present moment awareness means we cannot avoid stepping into the unknown that follows it immediately. And to do that we realized we simply have to put in more faith into the life within and trust it to take care of us. And we are doing that. We are going away together to explore and experiment in deeper and truer healing. And, as usual with our lives so far, the experiment is first on us. We didn’t have to go away to let this healing happen, but the moment the realization to heal deeper came for us the universe opened doors for a perfect space to heal!

As a result, we are both taking a long sabbatical and we are closing Purple Room Healing for the public. The leave is for at least six months. The blog and all its articles will still be available for you all. We are also opening a site and another blog to share our onward (and inward) journey and to write about the practice of awareness. We will announce them here soon once we have made the physical transition to our new home and personal healing space.

Thank you all clients and friends who made this journey with us. We learnt a lot from each of you and we hope each of you had equally benefited through the help we could extend.

“The only freedom we’ve got is not to react to anything, but to turn within and know the truth.” – Robert Adams

Funnel Vision: How we fabricate our own doomed futures

We let our experiences limit our future possibilities.
We let our experiences limit our future possibilities.

How many straight lines can we draw from a dot? Infinite. It means there is infinite number of viewpoints from which you can see a dot. How many straight lines can we draw connecting two dots? Only one. And this line can be further projected on any side of the dots to predict the occurrence of similar dots. This is funnel vision. As our mind connects similar experiences (dots) across time, it tends to project a future with narrowed possibilities and diminishing joy. Think of it as an inverted funnel place in front of our eyes, like eyeglasses, and we can see only through the small opening at the base of the funnel.

Funnel Effect is common to all of us and most of us fail to recognize its presence and effect upon our lives. Our minds have infinite capacities to bring to us (or take us into) those experiences that prove our existing beliefs. For instance, if a girl believes that all her romantic relationships would end in the man dumping her then that is all she will experience or fight against one relationship after the other. After a few relationships, she may form a new belief that all men are untrustworthy. And she then continues to attract herself into hands of such men. And if she chances upon a trustworthy relationship, her funnel vision can cause her to remain suspicious of the man in her life and can even end up in severing the relationship out of her inability to trust him.

What this girl, in this instance, fails to understand is that her first incident of heartbreak had become the base out of which she operated in the next experiences. Either she would want the same outcome if it makes her happy, or she would want to avoid the outcome if it had suffered her. The very pain has become a yardstick of measure for her. And even the very first experience could have been attracted due to an underlying feeling of undeservedness and poor self-image she had experienced in childhood.

The problem with this emotional approach is that the emotions can make a mere possibility seem a certainty thus creating an anticipation and preparedness – a narrowing of our vision. Naturally when the situation occurs we interpret it through our narrowed or filtered vision and give out prepared reactions only to regret later on. Sometimes the narrowed viewpoint is so strong that we may not even realize our misinterpretation for long.

Our rational mind is also not free from such bias or funnel vision. In fact, it can have more devastating effects in some cases. When a logical mind has to make predictions about an event, it always estimates possibilities based on past similar experiences in our lives or other’s. But all data from past is based not on reality but on the memory of the experience of the reality – either ours or of others around us. That’s like mistaking twice adulterated milk to be pure milk.

Another problem with rational mind is its blind reliance on science. There is an excellent dialogue from the movie Men in Black that beautifully illustrates this problem. Tommy Lee Jones makes this statement to Will Smith after Smith’s first experience with an alien being: “Fifteen hundred years ago everybody knew the Earth was the center of the universe. Five hundred years ago, everybody knew the Earth was flat, and fifteen minutes ago, you knew that humans were alone on this planet. Imagine what you’ll know tomorrow.”

A logical mind concludes often fails to understand what it ‘knows’ could be just one, its personal, version of reality and not the truth.

Logical mind kills joy because of its tendency to be too controlling. Emotional mind increases pain because of its tendency to indulge. Funnel vision causes this to become reality of the future. Think of it as series of dots joined by a line, only the mind did not just create the line but it even ended up creating the dot after dot in its life based on its past prejudices.

When experiences in our lives become our beliefs, we undergo a gradual narrowing of our vision and philosophy in our lives to such extent that all we get to experience of life is but a tiniest fraction of its wondrous spectrum of possibilities. We trace a path of suffering, struggle, and strife ahead of us and end up living it just because we assumed a possibility to be a certainty.

So how do we get rid of this funnel in front of our eyes? By first acknowledging its presence. Unless we know our vision is narrow, we will remain the proverbial frog in a well that thinks the well is the whole universe.

Paying complete attention to the moment can dissolve funnel vision and expand our horizons.
Paying complete attention to the moment can dissolve funnel vision and expand our horizons.

The second step is to learn to be in the moment instead of simply accepting the viewpoint our thoughts portray based on our past memories. We cannot stop the funnel vision from giving extremely convincing viewpoints. But we can stop ourselves from entirely believing the viewpoints and being open to the present moment as if it were our first experience. And that is also the truth. No matter how many times we may have experienced events similar to the current situations we are in, we have never experienced this moment before.

We can color this moment and make it as painful as the past with our complicit acceptance of the funnel vision. Or we can simply let every moment become a fresh experience by paying attention to this moment to see what we can experience this time. When we remain absolutely open to the moment, life can surprise us with new joys and experiences that we never had before. Deeper doors within us can open up making us more sensitive to the wonders of life. And this also serves to widen our visions and eventually get rid of the funnel effect altogether.

Suggested Readings:
Cinderella Syndrome
Simple Meditation Technique to deal with Anxiety
Self Abuse

Photo Courtesy by freedigitalphotos
Dark Tunnel With Light by pakorn
Cityscape Sunset by Vichaya Kiatying-Angsulee

Reiki Healing Beginner Level 1 & 2 Workshop – 1, 2 June 2013

Image Learn Reiki Healing through our Reiki Beginner Level 1 & 2 Healing Workshop in Chennai this weekend on June 1, 2. Read more about Reiki here.

Eligibility: Anybody interested in learning a healing method that can help heal their issues and heal others as well.

Date: 1,2 June 2013 (Saturday and Sunday)

Place: Purple Room Healing, Besant Nagar

Number of Seats: 6

Final Registration Date: 30 May, 2013
Seats limited to 6 per workshop. Please call and register early. Registrations close by Thursday, 30 May.

Call Kiran at 9500117031 for details and registration.

Cord Cutting – Introduction, Benefits and Detailed Procedure for Self Healing

A brief about Energetic Cords.

Cord Cutting can help improve relationships
Cord Cutting can help improve relationships

When people are in any kind of a relationship they start bonding to each other through energetic cords. Think of them as tubes of various sorts connecting one another. There are basically two kinds of cords. Soul level cords – these are cords of love and they cannot be cut. These are soul level connections which share just love between each other. They do not harm the person. The second kind of cords are personality or karmic cords – these are cords that can exert unnecessary influence on each other. They are formed willingly albeit subconsciously. They are formed out of repeated behaviour by the people in relationship or through one major emotional event. For instance, a mother who routinely blames a son for not being good to her and the son allowing those accusations to feed his guilt, forms a cord and the mother could (consciously or unconsciously) use it to manipulate her son. They are also called Karmic cords because they can indicate karmic debts coming from the past.

Each person can have any number of such cords in one relationship itself. Even with the relationship continuing, it is essential to cut these cords because they will make the relationship healthier. It is all the more important that cord cutting is done when the relationship ends.

Benefits of Cord Cutting

  • Cord cutting improves any relationship. It clears up unhealthy habits between people and helps them form healthier habits in the relationship.
  • Cord cutting can be done to improve any relationship – parent child, life partners, lovers, past relationships, ex boyfriend girlfriends, friends, sibling, boss subordinate, colleagues, classmates, teacher student, and any other relationships.
  • It heals you tremendously. You find a huge relief from the emotions you’ve been carrying because of the relationship.
  • You release a lot of pent up negative emotions that you have been suppressing and carrying around for sometime. Some times, it also releases emotions held up over years.

    Fears and Blocks created by past breakups may be cleared with cord cutting.
    Fears and Blocks created by past breakups may be cleared with cord cutting.
  • It clears blocks in relationship issue, especially in your love life. When single people go through many relationship issues in the past they form unconscious blocks and fears about life partners in their life and they start acting out of these fears from the past. This tends to ruin any good future relationship they can potentially form.
  • It helps you identify hidden motivations in relationships both within self and in others.
  • Cord cutting gives you the ‘breathing space’ you need. Your behaviour is no longer automatic or compulsive. You will find that you can now change your behaviour easily.

Procedure for Cord Cutting:

It takes about 20-30 min sometimes, so make sure nobody disturbs you for so long. Don’t do this after dark.

Step1 – Relaxation and Creating inner awareness.

  • Sit or lie down in some quiet place. Focus on your natural breathing.
  • Now slowly start deep breathing with your focus on your lower lungs and abdomen. Take ten deep breaths.
  • Follow that by 15 short rapid breaths. These breaths are quick, shallow, and without pause.
  • Observe the breathing come back to normal breathing.

Step 2 – Activating subconscious and Shielding

  • Now visualize yourself in a serene, beautiful garden. Make sure the garden has a water body in it like a lake, fountain, stream, beach, or a waterfall.

    Visualize the garden or landscape as vividly as you can!
    Visualize the garden or landscape as vividly as you can!
  • Take time to create the garden completely in your visualization. See the blue sky, trees, birds, flowers, fruits, grass – just take time to ‘feel’ the place.
  • Now imagine sitting in a calm space in the garden.
  • Imagine a bright beautiful golden yellow or white light in the sky directly above you coming down, and touching the top of your head.
  • Let the light enter your body through the top of your head and fill your entire body till the tip of your toes with this bright, beautiful, vibrant, tingling light.
  • See the light expanding into a bubble of protection all around you including under you.

Step 3 – Locating the ‘Feeling Centers’

  • Now call the person you want to cut cords with into the garden. See the person clearly coming into the garden and standing before you.enery release
  • Notice your first feelings about her/him – all of them – both negative as well as positive.
  • Now observe where each of these feelings is beginning in your body. (Ask yourself ‘If this feeling was stored in my body physically, where would it be?’)
  • You will find that each feeling has a place in your body (like, for instance, hurt stored in your heart center, etc)
  • Give each feeling a color and a shape – whatever you feel like. (you can ask ‘If this feeling had a color and a shape what would it be like?’)
  • For instance, you may see hurt as dirty green ball in your heart center, you may see anger as a red monster attached to you at solar plexus, or you may notice helplessness as blobs of  yellow on your hand – these are just examples. You can give any color and shape you feel like. Sometimes the moment you trace the feeling to place in the body you may instantly perceive it as some object or being.

Step 4 – Scanning and Locating Cords

  • Now visualize the other person also also in a beam of their own light from the sky and with their own bubble of protection.
  • Start ‘scanning’ the person from top of his/her head. Your intention is to look for personality or karmic cords of energies that connect both of you.
  • You may ‘see’ or ‘feel’ these cords.

    Scan for all cords extending between you both.
    Scan for all cords extending between you both.
  • When you see the first cord, make a note of where on his/her body is the cord beginning, follow that cord to see where in your body the cord is penetrating.
  • Now take time to notice the details of the cord – its thickness, what does it look like, is it brittle or flexible, all the details that strike you.
  • Now see if the energy flow in the cord is one way or both ways – that is, is this cord feeding energy from one person to another only, or is this cord used by both to cross feed each other.
  • You may remember some past events when you are doing this, you may find certain emotions coming up sometimes. If that happens, just make a note of it.
  • Continue scanning.
  • Locate all cords between you and the other person.
  • You may notice many cords are end or begin at ‘feeling centers’ that you located earlier.

Step 5 – Cutting Cords

  • Once you have located all cords between you and the other person, you proceed with energy negotiation and cord cutting.
  • Move to the first cord you found.

    Some relationship cords could be restricting our behavior.
    Some relationship cords could be restricting our behavior.
  • If the energy is coming from her/him to you, ask yourself if you still feel a need to accept that energy or emotion from her/him. Only when your answer is a firm no can you really cut the cord. Otherwise, it means you are not yet ready to cut the cords. Even if you attempt it, in such a case, the cord will reconnect itself back.
  • When the answer is a firm no, you should see the flow of energy coming from her/him through the cord stopping immediately.
  • Now tell her/him that she/he needs to stop sending that energy to you. Tell her/him that your karma to accept those energies is complete and any energy she/he continues to send, if it bounces back to her/him, then it is of no karmic consequence to you since you have no intention of affecting her/him. It is her/him own doing.
  • If the energy is going outwards from you, ask yourself what emotion or influence from you is feeding that person. You will instantly get an answer. You may again remember an event of the past or a particular emotion coming up strongly within.
  • Ask yourself, if you are ready to let go of the need to influence the other person with these energies of yours. The answer should be no again. If the answer is yes or if you feel hesitant, look back at the suffering you are undergoing for still being connected to her/him. This can convince you to let go.
  • Once again, when you answer with a firm no, you will see the energy flow from you to the other person stopping instantly.
  • If the energy flow is two way, then you will naturally do all the above steps.
  • Only when you see the energy flow stopping, will you proceed to cut the cords.
  • There are a few ways to cut the cords. You should choose whichever feels right for each cord. I am listing couple of methods here. You may intuitively feel other creative ways to remove the cord connection.

Method 1:

  • You can request a sword or shears (large garden scissors!) made of light to cut the cords. You will find the requested tool coming to you from the light above.
  • Use it to cut the cord as close to your body as possible.
  • Now request for a ball of light and you will find a small ball (about the size of an apple) coming from the light above.
  • Rub that ball at the place on your body where you have cut the cord.
  • Notice this light sealing off the ‘hole’ left behind on your body after cutting the cord.
  • Proceed to do the same steps with the other person in cutting the same cord. So you will cut that cord from the other end by the same procedure above.
  • Yes, you need to cut the cord from the other person’s end too no matter how much you dislike the other person. You do this because the cord that is cut needs to be destroyed.
  • If the other person feels the need for the same cord, they will form another with somebody else but not you.
  • This also helps you get rid of cords of resentment easily. For anger and resentment are also means of attachments.
  • Cleanse and seal their body with the ball of light.
  • Destroy the cord by burning it. See the smoke and ashes pulled up into the sky through a third beam of light. This is not the beams of light that is on your or on her.
  • Proceed to cut all the remaining cords similarly.

Method 2:

  • Here you uproot the cord out of the body instead of cutting it. That’s the only difference.
  • This is done if you feel any particular cord has ‘grown into you’ and has roots within.
  • Hold the cord with both the hands as close to the body as you can.
  • Visualize white light forming around the roots of the cords within so they help to ‘slide the roots out’.
  • Pull the cord out of the body slowly.
  • Notice the roots sliding out gently. Pull until the cord is uprooted completely.
  • If any roots are broken and left within the body, request the light above you to dissolve the root completely and flush it out of your either into the ground below or by sucking it up into the light.
  • Follow the cleansing and sealing with the ball of light as described in Method 1 above.
  • Do the same for the other person.
  • Destroy the cord by burning it. See the smoke and ashes pulled up into the sky through a third beam of light. This is not the beams of light that is on your or on her.
  • Proceed to cut all the remaining cords similarly.

Step 6 – Finding Hidden Cords

  • When people send psychic energies out of, conscious or unconscious, malevolent intent or a desperate need to cling, such cords may not show up in the regular scan.

    Visualize a special violet light coming down upon you from the sky.
    Visualize a special violet light coming down upon you from the sky.
  • Just to make sure there are no such hidden cords, visualize a beam of violet light falling in between you and other person you want to cut cords with.
  • Visualize this light expanding outwards towards you on one side, and him/her on the other until finally you both are under this huge beam of violet light.
  • Any hidden cords will instantly show up in this violet light.
  • Go ahead and follow the usual procedure to identify, describe, stop the energy flows, and cut these cords too.

Step 7 – Healing ‘Feeling Centers’ and Leftover Energies

  • This is an important step. You will be healing the ‘Feeling Centers’ that you located earlier as well as any energy you may have already absorbed through the cords into you before they were cut. As I said, many cords would enter your body at the ‘feeling centers’.

    You may see the energy dissolving into smoke and being sucked up into the light.
    You may see the energy dissolving into smoke and being sucked up into the light.
  • After you cut the cords, go back to the place where the first cord was and ask yourself if any energies that you may have absorbed (through the cord before it was cut) is still within you.
  • If there are any left, give those energies a colour and shape just like you did for the ‘feeling centers’ earlier. You are creating a visual form for the energies. Sometimes you may intuitively feel the form readily.
  • Ask the light above to dissolve this energy and cleanse it out of you.
  • You may notice the light dissolving the energy into smoke and sucking it up into the sky.
  • Continue healing all the leftover energies for all the cords you cut.
  • Now go to the remaining ‘feeling centers’ and do the same.
  • If you find it difficult to heal any remaining ‘feeling centers’, then it means you still want to hold on to that emotion you feel there. Try to see various viewpoints as to why it is good for you to let go of that emotion. Only when your intention to let go is firm, can you fully heal.

Step 7 – Final Shielding

  • Ask the other person you cut cords with to go away and live his/her life peacefully. See him/her leave the garden.
  • Connect fully with the light above. See it flowing into you through the top of your head. Absorb the light fully into your every pore and aspect of being.

    Visualize a white light from above entering you through the top of your head.
    Visualize a white light from above entering you through the top of your head.
  • Request the light to do a final clean up to remove all leftover fragments and pieces of energies which may have been overlooked or left behind.
  • Request the light to ‘fill up’ all the empty spaces where the ‘feeling center’ energies or leftover energies had been.
  • Feel the energy of the light filling your whole being. You may get a tingling sensation while this happens.
  • Now visualize this light expanding around you again into a ball of powerful shielding. It should expand at least three feet away from you in all directions including under you.
  • Spend about a minute of awareness on this beautiful and peaceful ball of light.
  • Take a deep breath. Open your eyes.

Exercise to follow post Cord Cutting

  • Do this exercise the next 21 days after the cord cutting is done.
  • Visualizing a ball of light around you at least three times a day. Those visualizations need not be as strong as they were when you did the cord cutting meditation. But nevertheless, just do it. This will strengthen your aura and increase your protection.

Important Notes:

  • Sometimes we notice people you cut cords with suddenly try to contact you within 48 hours of cord cutting. Even people who you have had lost touch with too. If such a thing happens in the next 48 hours after cord cutting, keep away from showing any sympathy or empathy towards the person or his/her plight. It is sometimes seen that the person you cut cords with will feel a ‘pull’ to connect back those cords and they try that, unconsciously of course, through appealing to the emotions of the person who cut the cords.
  • Forming new cords is as easy as cutting cords. Cord cutting clears up negative energy within. But it is now up to you to replace that space with positive thoughts, and behaviour patterns. Otherwise cords reform easily.
  • What it means is that after cord cutting, your behaviour in that relationship is no longer programmed, or out of control, or habitual. You have control over your responses and you must choose a positive response now to replace the old one.
  • Examine your needs which made gave you the fears and unhealthy behaviour in the first place. Every relationship is based out of a need to fulfil some internal lack. That lack is always related to self-image. Ask yourself what impulses or lacks motivated you to seek such unhealthy relationship or behaviour in the past. Start working that lack instead of seeking to fulfil from outside.

We hope this article will come in useful on your self-healing journey. You can always find this article from our archives by clicking on the ‘Self Help’ tag or category.

Thanks

Purple Room Healing

Suggested Readings:

How much time do you spend for your mental health?

Eternal Human Conflict: What should be and what is?

House Cleansing: Balancing the energies of your space

Photo Courtesy by Freedigitalphotos.net

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“Couple In Love Having Break Up” by smarnad
“Deep Forest Waterfall” by pat138241
“Hand” by Salvatore Vuono
“Tug Of War Between Two Girls” by meepoohfoto
“Tied Hand” by Danilo Rizzuti
“Violet” by zirconicusso
“Abstract Smoke” by Worakit Sirijinda
“Stars Are Falling On The Background Of Blue Luminous Rays” by SOMMAI

The Cinderella Syndrome

ImageImagine this: A poor lonely girl sitting alone by herself on a starlit night full of sorrow and suffering. She is quietly weeping for herself and her pitiable condition. She has nobody to talk to and everybody around her is treating her badly including her family. She hopes somebody would come to her aid. She is yearning for her prince and savior to come along and save her from her plight. Someone who would love her with all his heart and make her worthy of her life. This is the Cinderella Syndrome.

We all know the Cinderella story. The poor fatherless girl mistreated by her step-mother and made to scrub the floor all day. She yearns for a better life and weeps all night long. One day her step-sisters go to the ball at the palace. Cinderella wishes she could go to the ball too. And lo, a fairy godmother appears and turns Cinderella’s rags into a lovely dress, and rats and pumpkin into horses and a chariot. Cinderella dances with the prince at the ball who is taken by her beauty. By the hour of midnight, heeding the warning of the Fairy godmother, Cinderella rushes out of the ball leaving behind her glass slipper. The prince has his staff search for the girl whose foot would fit the glass slipper. Cinderella’s foot fits and she is married to the prince, and she lives ever after.

ImageThe Cinderella Syndrome is a real life situation of a fatherless girl who was unconsciously playing the Cinderella for real. Unfortunately, Cinderella stories don’t end well in reality. This girl had prince after prince coming to her rescue but they would then eventually desert her and go.

This happens because her mind had to survive her identity which she formed of herself from early childhood. And that identity was that of a lonely, suffering girl who is hurt by near and dear again and again. Once the mind forms an identity for the person, its goal is to keep it alive – to keep both the body and the identity alive. So for this girl, in spite of yearning and manifesting princes into her life, her mind has to still keep her lonely and suffering, hurt by near and dear. Now the near and dear also include her romantic relationships. Yet her desperation to get out of the situation is also real.

So she battles with herself endlessly. She manages to attract guys who would take advantage of her desperation and then dump her. She would be left once more the poor Cinderella. After a few repeated such incidents she has a fear of relationships which all the more helps her to remain the suffering Cinderella.

Real life Cinderella is helpless by choice, derives melancholic enjoyment of her loneliness, noble in her own view due to her uncomplaining (not entirely) suffering. Her self-pity, self-hatred, and her pride keep her remaining that way.

There is only one way for real life Cinderellas to get out of this miserable loop – to decide not to be a Cinderella in the first place. They need to give up their life story. They need to look beneath the voids they carry within to find out their true self. The Cinderella Syndrome is an addiction to pain.

Most real life Cinderellas carry a deep void within. They wait for an outside hero to come and fill that void. This is their second mistake. The first and their biggest mistake is in assuming they are the void within. Instead of trying to fill the void, they need to question the reality of the void they carry within. Is she the identity she formed in her childhood? Or is she somebody else? Can she, as a life, survive if that identity is snatched away from her? The day real life Cinderellas can give a yes to the last question, they can effectively come out of their troubles and heal their lives.

Healing Crystals – Coming Soon!

Amethyst Angel Crystal
Amethyst Angel Crystal

We are very happy to announce we are shortly introducing Healing Crystal products on sale at our holistic healing center Purple Room Healing. Traditionally crystals have been used for various healing purposes across centuries. Today, crystal healing is an independent healing modality by itself. Crystals like Clear Quartz, Rose Quartz, Amethyst, Tiger’s Eye, Carnelian, Labradorite, Garnet, Bloodstone, Agate, Rainbow Moonstone, Tourmaline, Obsidian, Kyanite and a hundred other crystals are used for healing various issues including Personal, Physical, Professional, Emotional, Mental, and Spiritual areas of life. They are also for protection, to heal negativity, and for various other problems.

Crystals come in various forms including Geodes and clusters, Rough stones, tumbles, pyramids, merkaba stars, beads for bracelets and crystal jewellery, towers, Angels, pencils, spheres, oval cabochons, pendants, etc. Crystal wands are used in various energy healing therapies including Pranic Healing, Crystal Therapy, Reiki, Shamanic Healing, etc. Bracelets are the most preferred way of using crystals for personal healing. Advanced Reiki Healers and Reiki Masters use Reiki Grid a grid made of crystals arranged in particular esoteric and geometric patterns. Reiki Grids help in magnifying the healing energies and they also help to keep a steady and constant flow of Reiki energies to the clients or places that need regular healing. Reiki grids need to be regularly charged in order to heal better.

Crystal Pyramids, spheres are used for Therapies as well as to heal and protect spaces such as houses, business places, offices, etc.

Our products will be available for now in Chennai and Hyderabad. Please watch this page for more on crystals and our products.

Self Pity and Self Hatred: Two Dangerous Extremes

feeling sorry for oneselfLow self-esteem issues are quite common to my practice. In fact, all therapies in one way or the other have to do with self-image. And when we suffer from a low self-esteem problem and are unable to resolve it, we manage to cover it from the world by taking a defensive stand. Some become reserved and gruff, some put up a false intellectual front, some pretend to be uber happy, and some turn shy and silent, and then there are hundred other ways to cover it up.

Dealing with self-esteem issues or any issue for that matter is not a big deal if we are really willing to resolve our problems. But there are times when some of us tend to take an extreme stand about themselves after years of struggling with issues. One one extreme is self pity and other self hatred.

From a healing point of view, both are really dangerous attitudes. Because they not only prevent us from effectively resolving our issues but also become a very important reason why we are facing issues also. Let us see how.

Self pity is a sorry state. A person with self pity begins to see himself in a sorry state and as a figure of sacrifice. He feels he is a helpless victim of any situation and believes he would remain so. He often spends time in pitying himself and blaming others for his plight. He comes to feel so bad for himself so much that they readily accept the victim’s role as a part of who they are.

And once that happens, they continue to attract situations where they can play victims. The mind always makes true what it believes. It manipulates situations and people around to fulfill its needs and beliefs. So once the person believes he is a victim, he unconsciously seeks to worm himself into situations where he could become one. It is like if you become a doctor, you need to treat patients to justify your role. So you set up a medical practice and start seeking people with illnesses. Much similarly, the mind starts looking for situations and people who would victimize it so the self-pity is justified. These people carry a lot of resentment and anger within.

self hatredSelf hatred also works similarly but on the opposite side of the scale. Person who hates herself usually start playing the role of a perpetrator. She needs to justify her hatred. She just starts looking for victims and situations where she could have reasons to hate herself. In her mind, it’s all her fault! These people also carry a lot of guilt. They also carry a need to punish themselves.

People on these two extremes have a need to make sad stories of their lives. The truth is that need is neither ‘subconscious’ or ‘unconscious’. There is no need for a hypnotherapy regression or ‘psychological evaluation’ to bring up this need to the surface. All one has to do is to watch their thoughts and the motivations will be readily seen. If you can watch your thoughts with complete honesty – which means without denying or resisting them in any way – you can readily find out if you are carrying any of these traits in you. By watching your thoughts, you can also easily realize how you are manipulating yourself into a victim’s or a perpetrator’s role

This becomes the first block to any healing or therapy.  This needs to go in order to resolve other issues in your life. How can self pity and self hatred be healed? All you need is consistent refusal to take that attitude. Be alert in your head and watch your thoughts keenly. The moment you start feeling sorry for yourself and anger for situation or the moment you start cursing yourself and feel severe guilt, just move into the present moment and refuse to take that attitude. Be consistent and you can easily come out of that viewpoint.

Suggested Readings:
Emotional Drama
Power of Manifestation
It’s too late now!

Picture Courtesy: David Castillo Dominici @ freedigitalphotos.net

Simple Meditation Technique to deal with Anxiety and Stress – Part 2

Read the First Part here. The meditation technique is explained there.

Best Recommended Times

The recommended times are for getting the best out of this method. They are not mandatory. In fact, I recommend you not to take up all the below at once. That will simply become a burden to you and that will motivate you to give up the meditation practise.

I personally follow these and I do not meditate for no more than two minutes maximum each time. And I increased the frequency of this practise after I fell in love with the meditation, not before.

The best way to start the day is to become present in this moment when you wake up.
The best way to start the day is to become present in this moment when you wake up.

As soon as you wake up – this is especially good because it can have a great influence over your entire day.

In the toilet – this again is another time of the day where our thoughts and emotions then can affect the whole day. Just a few minutes of this meditation here will help us greatly.

Waiting in traffic or at other times can be a great time to meditate.
Waiting in traffic or at other times can be a great time to meditate.

During travel (if you are not operating the vehicle) – this is one of the best times, I’ve found, to meditate. In fact somehow it is easy for me to meditate while sitting in the bus or train. After this technique, I personally began to prefer travelling by bus or train over driving myself because it gives me a long time to meditate. Especially while returning from a day’s work, this meditation in bus has tremendous benefit. There is an immediate flushing of stress and anxiety which I used to carry from work to home.

Before beginning a work – I have found this to be another huge benefit. When you are able to move into ‘being in the moment’ before you start any work, it gives you the calmness as well as the presence of mind required to handle the task effectively. In fact, I found this even improved my performance.

Being in the moment after eating can help digestion and also tune to your listening to your body.
Being in the moment after eating can help digestion and also tune to your listening to your body.

Immediately after eating – If you do this over a few weeks, you will even gain an amazing ability. You will be able to tell if the food that you just consumed is good for you or not. Body has a great ability to communicate what it wants and what it can’t digest. But we never listen. This technique helps you gain back that listening habit. Not only will your stomach tell you if the food you ate is good for you or not, but if you ate something that is particularly not so suitable for your constitution, the few minutes of this meditation after food actually helps reduce the discomfort or indigestion problem. Of course, that does not mean you can continue to eat whatever you like and use this technique like some antacid tonic. When your body communicates, listen to it. Try to avoid that food stuff in future.

Evenings when free – This is the time when I practise this for a slightly longer time like about ten to fifteen minutes. Sometimes, if I find time, I do this in the mornings instead. This helps me become more anchored in that state of peace and calmness, and also helps me get into this practise easily even during most stressful times in the day.

Before going to bed – I sleep with this technique. It will soon help you fall asleep faster.

Getting the Best Out Of This Meditation Practise – Meditation Tips and Advice

Be in the moment and you will soon enjoy the moment as it is.
Be in the moment and you will soon enjoy the moment as it is.

Enjoy the meditation – Just be and you will quickly fall in love with this meditation. Whenever you are being in your body, you will find a certain peace and calmness in it.

Let it grow upon you – Let the meditation grow upon you not the other way round! Do not try to overwhelm yourself with doing this too many times in the beginning. You are trying to acquire a habit of regular meditation. And anything that you dislike or are trying to force upon self can be tough to become a habit.

Take it easy – If you take this meditation too seriously (instead of enthusiastically) you are only adding to your stress. Remember you are trying to find peace out of this meditation. The more desperate you grow the less likely you will find peace. Just take it easy.

Skip once in a while – Take a break when you feel like it. The importance of peace and calmness is felt more in its absence. Don’t be a stickler to punctuality and discipline. If you enjoy the meditation it will become a part of your daily routine quickly enough.

Don’t try too hard – Once in a while you may find it difficult to move into the ‘here and now’ when you are too stressed out or emotional. Don’t try hard. With enough practise during other times you will soon, within weeks, reach a state where you can go into the meditation even during high stress.

Don’t empty mind – Again the emphasis is to be your posture and thus enter this moment. Not on emptying your head of thoughts. There is no need to change your thoughts. Move your focus from them to your body.

Stay on the goal – As you become more practised in this meditation technique, you will find some interesting latent abilities of yours getting activated. For instance, sometimes when I am doing this meditation, I become aware of the mood and thoughts of people around me. Stay with the goal. And the goal is to gain peace and be stress-free. If you start pursuing this meditation for the sake of latent powers you will lose both peace as well as the powers.

Experience this moment – Each time you do this meditation you may have a different experience. The goal is to be the posture and experience this moment as it is. Do not try to reproduce the experience of your previous meditations. That is where you can get lost and lose peace.

Do it as you are – Do not try to assume special postures for the meditation. Just move into the posture you have at the moment. Of course you can adjust a limb or two for the sake of convenience. Sometimes you can also realign your posture as a physical way of ‘gathering your mind’. Special postures or asanas can restrict the places and times when you can practise this meditation.

 

Suggested Readings:

Simple Meditation Technique for healing Anxiety and Stress – Part 1

How much time do you spend for your mental health? – Part 1

How much time do you spend for your mental health? – Part 2

Frustration: Shortcut to Failure

 

Photo Courtesy: graur codrin, rakratchada torsap, Stuart Mile @ freedigitalphotos.net

Simple Meditation Technique to deal with Anxiety and Stress – Part 1

You do not need special places, timing, or even postures for effective meditation.
You do not need special places, timing, or even postures for effective meditation.

In the last posts (Part 1 & Part 2) I discussed about mental health and the most important time of the day where your emotions and thoughts can set a trend for the day. This post let me share with you a very simple meditation method that will help you reduce stress and anxiety dramatically in your daily life. It can also help you become attain peace and calmness if you practise it every day.

The very word meditation sometimes puts us off. We have, at least some of us, have tried in the past various meditation techniques and have failed to achieve the consistency in practise. Two most important obstacles were time and achieving concentration. We either did not have the time to put aside for the meditation. Some meditation techniques demanded a particular time of the day be set aside for it, especially like early mornings which turn out to be particularly difficult for those who are night birds. Some meditation methods insisted on long durations of practise – sometimes even an hour out of our daily routine. The other reason why we give up a few other meditation techniques is because of its demand of nearly super human single minded concentration which seems to be more difficult than time. Just when we want to empty our minds that all sorts of silly thoughts come into our heads.

The meditation technique which I am sharing is neither time consuming nor requires inordinate amounts of mental concentration. You don’t even need to practise it at a regular time too. In fact, the efficacy of this meditation technique lies in practising it everywhere and anywhere you can.

Move into this moment using your body. Now is where Peace is.
Move into this moment using your body. Now is where Peace is.

The Technique

The technique is deceptively simple. All you need to do is to simply move your awareness into your body and this moment. Let me explain how to do that.

First of all, you do not have to assume any meditative posture for this. Doing that can help you initially if you are used to practising meditations, but otherwise it’s not necessary. Again the best benefits of this technique can be extracted if you do this anywhere in any posture.

Simply begin by watching your posture. This can be done either by closing your eyes or with your eyes open. The goal here is to bring yourself, your mind I mean, into this moment and to ground yourself. It means you are bringing yourself here and now. Becoming aware of your posture or physical presence is an easy way to do this. Be like this for a while.

Become aware of your body from the inside. It means you are going into being the posture. See, all postures are actions like sitting, lying, standing, resting, etc. So go into that doing. Be it. Be the sitting person, be the standing person, or be whatever your posture is doing right now. Do not be deceived by the simplicity of this technique. Try it and you will find tremendous results.

The Thinking Mind

Just become aware of your thoughts. No need to control them or suppress them.
Just become aware of your thoughts. No need to control them or suppress them.

Well, what about the mind? You do not have to empty your mind. Just watch it. Do not try to clear your mind. Neither do you try to hang on to a particular thought. Just let them be – in the background. Your awareness is into your posture. Into being.

It means you are letting your mind be what it wants to be and YOU are going away from it. Yes, you and your mind can be separated like that. By ‘you’ here I mean your awareness. So simply let your thoughts be, let your mind be.

What you are doing is letting everything be. You are not trying to change anything. You are moving into the being of the moment. So, like I said, it does not require extraordinary consciousness. Just plain awareness. It’s easy.

Time and Duration

Do it anywhere you want. without any special postures or asanas.
Do it anywhere you want. without any special postures or asanas.

You can do this meditation anytime and anywhere. And you can do this for any duration ranging from just a few seconds to an hour too. In fact, I would not recommend that you do this for longer duration at a set time of the day like other meditation practises. The efficacy of this technique lies in its time flexibility.

I have noticed that in meditation practises people tend to get the best benefit out of it during their early days of practise and then gradually the benefits seem to disappear. The problem is not with the technique but in our ability to compartmentalize our daily routine. We usually stop the benefits of meditation influencing us in the rest of the day after the meditation. In the beginning days of practise, we are so motivated that we feel the lightness, joy, calmness, or peace that we gained during the meditation all through the day. After the initial motivation wanes, we tend to go back to our worry patterns and even the meditation seems to become a burden at times. So what peace we gain during the meditation practise seems to fade within ten minutes of getting up. Yes, any good meditation practise can change that and affect our whole life positively in a long term practise. But that again takes us back to our initial problem of consistency in practise.

So the best way to gain benefit out of this practise is to do this meditation just about two or three minutes or less and do it number of times per day. As you do not have a restriction of posture and you don’t even have to close your eyes for this meditation, it makes it easy to practise this meditation just about anywhere. While sitting in the office or the class during a break, while travelling (if you are not driving, of course), during brief periods of waiting, in the toilet, just after eating. Read the next part here for some best recommended times that can provide greatest benefit out of this technique.

Benefits of Meditation

The meditation can help you remain peaceful and calm all through the day easily.
The meditation can help you remain peaceful and calm all through the day easily.

The first thing that you will notice is the flushing of stress and anxiety. An instant calmness will come over your body and mind as you become aware of them. When you move into the posture and be the posture, what happens is that you are letting go of your identity with your thoughts. You are not stopping the thoughts, but are not attaching yourself with them anymore. Again, the goal is to move into ‘here and now’. Be only in this moment. Any thoughts about the next moment let them be. Just watch them. Don’t try to change them.

This technique acts a vacuum cleaner for stress and emotions. What I mean is that it can effectively stop stress and bothersome emotions from affecting other areas of your life. So when you practise this regularly, you stop carrying emotions across different areas of your life. Stress of your personal life will not affect your professional area. And vice versa.

Due to its flexibility, this technique can be incorporated in your daily life far easily than other longer methods. Of course you can continue any other meditations and Kriyas that you are already doing or intend to take up. In fact, this practise will aid you in other mind management or spiritual techniques.

A constant state of peace will become yours when you pepper this practise along the entire day. You will notice that you are able to look at problems in their proper perspective and proportion. In fact you will even be able to deal with tougher issues with a presence of mind. Worry becomes lesser.

The second part of this post gives you some best recommended times to practise this meditation as well as more useful tips to get the most out of this meditation practice. Read the second part of this post here.

Suggested Readings:

How much time do you spend for your mental health? – Part 1

How much time do you spend for your mental health? – Part 2

Simple Meditation Technique to remove Stress and Anxiety – Part 2

Frustration: The Shortcut to Failure

 

Photo Courtesy: adamr, digitalart, Ambro @ freedigitalphotos.net

Purple Room in Chennai now!

Finally we are happy to announce that we are moving to Chennai. The Hyderabad branch will still function however with only Reiki Services.

Our core services and operations will be from Chennai. The new healing space is in Besant Nagar – about two minutes walk from the glorious Elliot’s Beach. We are looking forward to working there and the operations will be fully function by the end of the first week of May. It will be a healing experience for all of us!

The services in Chennai will be:

Hypnotherapy
Past Life Regression Therapy
Reiki Healing
Metaphor Therapy
Spirit Release Therapy
Tarot Card Reading
Angel Card Reading
Emotional Empowerment Therapy

We will soon announce Body Language and other workshops in Chennai too.

Yeah, updated Chennai contact numbers are put up below. You can also look up the ‘Contact Us‘ page for more.

Kiran Relangi – +91 9500117031

Geetha Pallavi – +91 9500117083

As usual the consultation is only through prior appointment. Feel free to call us for any clarifications.

Photo Courtesy: Chuck Felix @ freedigitalphotos.net

Comparing a 5th Grader with a Post Graduate?

Do you compare a 5th grade child to a Post Graduate and scold the child for not knowing calculus or literature? Then why do you compare your inabilities with the most talented person and chide yourself? The mistaken logic of considering peers to be naturally equal to you creates unnecessary issues in our lives.

Do you compare a 5th grade child to a Post Graduate and scold the child for not knowing calculus or literature? Then why do you compare your inabilities with the most talented person and chide yourself?

This is a common trait we all carry and fail to see the mistaken logic behind it. I often get clients who come and say they lack a particular talent. Things will be fine if they stop at that. But they go ahead compare themselves to their peers in this area of talent and start criticising themselves. What they fail to understand is that they are making unfair comparisons and drawing wrong conclusions about themselves.

For instance, I had a client who was 35 and worked in an MNC. He lacked in communication skills and he had come to resolve that. He would often compare himself to his colleagues who are of his age and feel very bad that he was not as communicative as them. This in turn developed a marked inferiority complex in him. Until I pointed it out, he failed to see the mistake in his logic.

All of us have, more or less, equal capacity to grasp and learn a talent or skill. But because of the circumstances in which we grow up we tend to pick up certain skills faster than others, while missing out altogether on some skills. Figuratively, we can say that we are Doctorates or Post Graduates in those skills we had developed well while in some other skills we are still at a Primary or a Pre-primary level.

In the above case, the client was a primary school student in communication skills while in his technical skills he was certainly top notch. So where is the logic in picking a peer who is a Doctorate in communication skills and saying that I am not as talented? That is the path of doom and failure.

We simply need to understand that we have to start honing the underdeveloped skill as if we are learning it for the first time – because we are in fact learning it for the first time. And also expect to make those mistakes that any beginner will tend to make. Yes, our peers may laugh at us when we make mistakes, but ask yourself if you want to improve at the risk of being laughed at for a short while or hide behind a defence all your life pretending to be talented and worrying within all life through!

Once I pointed this to my client, he was able to focus on what was important – learning to communicate better – than comparing with peers and feeling depressed. It was in no time that he was able to communicate himself better. He has more milestones to cover, but the block that was even stopping him from making journey was gone forever.

And it is not just in communication issues that we make such mistakes. It is in many areas like relationships, financial stability, looks and image, technical talents, soft skills, and in many such that we compare unequal people just because they are of similar ages and put ourselves or others down unfairly. Stop doing that. See your mistaken logic. And start developing your skills if that is what you want!

Photo Courtesy: photostock @ freedigitalphotos.net

Suggested Reading:

Social Averages
Emotional Age
Mind Drama 


Anger Management – Part I – Important Facts About Anger

First step towards anger management is understanding what anger is and who does it belong to. Unless we realize anger is a defense mechanism and we are responsible for choosing it as a reaction, we cannot hope to resolve our anger issues.

Anger Management Part 1
Anger is a Defense Mechanism.

The biggest mistake we all make while dealing with our anger issues is assuming that anger is the core issue. Why I call it a mistake is because, though anger does cause complications in our lives and relationships, it is not the root cause. The root cause is violation of some belief or hurting of our ego. Anger then springs in its defence.

For any person suffering from short temper or violent anger issues, anger is a defence mechanism. Something inside has been hurt and we show anger to defend ourselves. Over time it could become a habitual defence, meaning it becomes a habit and we keep getting angry for even small matters.

By understanding that anger is a defence mechanism we have taken a successful first step towards resolving our anger issues. Because, we can now look beyond anger and deal with the actual issue causing it.

The second awareness that you need to have about anger is that it is your anger. Let me explain what I mean by that. When I get angry I show it on others; I blame others for my anger issues. But the truth is, no matter what the provocation, I chose to be angry. We choose our reactions. And in cases of short temper, the provocation is often trivial and our reactions are in excess.

It is very easy to say others are provoking us. But at the end of the day we are the ones who are left in misery and it is our relations that are getting strained. So unless we acknowledge that it is our anger and our problem, we cannot take charge of the situation.

The third important point to keep in mind about anger is that it spreads like cheese. When we get angry, we tend to carry it forward across time, situations and people. And more often than not, we end up showing our anger on somebody else who it was not meant to be upon. The anger at office is taken home and displayed there. Anger at the life partner is shown with children.

We often falsely assume that our temper issues have gone out of control when we start getting angry with everyone. But the truth is we are simply carrying one big anger from one person or place to every other place. We are just venting one this one big emotion in bits and pieces all through the day. Once we find the root issues that are causing this anger and work them out, our anger becomes very manageable.

In the next part I will discuss two powerful techniques that can take us a long way in managing our anger issues as well as identifying the root causes.

Photo Courtesy: Danilo Rizzuti @freedigitalphotos.net

Social Aver’ages’ – Part 1

Socially we are programmed to confirm to certain aver’ages’. These Social Aver’ages’ can end up making our lives miserable because of the importance we place on them.

‘I will be 29 next month and I am still not married!’ a girl told me once in my consultation. She is not alone in this.

‘I am 31 and I do not know how to mingle with people properly,’ many guys told me with obvious pain written all over their faces.

‘Most of my colleagues are much younger than me. I feel ashamed I am just a Team Leader in my office,’ is another statement (more or less) I hear again and again.

‘My younger brother earns much more than me!’

Every culture has its aver‘ages’ – an unwritten social chart that dictates appropriate age for each important phase in life. These aver‘ages’ are embedded in our minds as a product of childhood programming and peer pressure. Yes, they are subconscious. And we try our best to adhere to it. I get a lot of clients who have issues merely because they do not fall into these aver‘ages’. They place so much of emphasis and importance that it is all they could think of day in and day out.

We fear so much what the world will say if we do not stick to these averages that we end up creating a severe critic within ourselves. Whether the world will look down upon us or not, the moment we fail any aver‘age’ this critic within will censure us endlessly. The result: We suffer from severe self-esteem issues. But that is just the beginning of our problems.

If our subconscious has an issue it cannot resolve, it will create a defence mechanism to hide that weakness from the world. The defence could be anger, withdrawal, arrogance, displacement of issue (where you start pointing out similar issues in others so they will become the butt of ridicule and you can hide behind the diversion), etc.

Over time, these defences themselves turn into issues merely because it had become a habit. Of course, simultaneously the stress being produced by the core issue within also manifests itself in various ways. The complexity of the issues grows so much that we even forget our core issue after sometime.

And it is all because of the importance we place on these aver‘ages’. Yes, the programming begins very early and is subconscious. But it does not mean that you cannot overcome it. Frankly, you don’t even need to rush to a therapist to address this issue. It just takes awareness, some effort, and persistence.

I will discuss more about what kind of awareness you need to carry and what effort is required in the next post.

Photo Courtesy: Salvatore Vuono at freedigitalphotos.net

Reiki Healing: A Boon for All

Reiki is a powerful Energy Healing Method with ability to heal diseases, emotional issues and clear negative energies.

Reiki Healing, HyderabadMy Journey into the wonderful healing world of Reiki has been surprising and deeply satisfying. Though I had been attuned for Reiki Level 1 as early as the year 2000, it was not until 2010 that I fully utilized the healing powers of Reiki.
Reiki is a very powerful healing technique that can be easily learned and applied by everyone. It’s applications vary from simple stress reduction to severe ailments as cancer and tuberculosis, from resolving situations to healing complex emotions, from removing blocks to clearing people and places of negative energies.
I found that Reiki and Hypnotherapy form a potent combination that can effectively take upon and resolve various issues.
In spite of its powerful healing capability, Reiki is a simple technique that can be learnt by all. Further, unlike Hypnotherapy, Reiki has no age or language bar. It can be applied on anyone of any age and gender and even upon pets, plants, places, and situations too! In fact, I’ve seen pets respond beautifully well to Reiki as equally as we humans do.
Further Reiki can be sent from distances too. So essentially I can do a Distance Reiki session for a person in Europe or Australia with the same results as a Hands-on Reiki session.
With Reiki my therapy sessions have become simpler, potent and doubly effective!